So many thoughts are running through my head right now so I will try to straighten them before typing, but knowing me, that won't happen. Last night I was at the store getting all my stuff to do my holiday baking. I am so excited to be able to do the holiday baking this year! I haven't done my own baking in a couple of years and boy have I missed it! I was so excited that I was literally dancing down the aisles of HEB, especially in the baked goods aisle. I didn't care that I was making a complete idiot out of myself, I was just so happy. I can't wait to get things started tomorrow. As I was shopping, I found some green curry and rice noodles in the Asian foods section and since I was feeling like curry I picked some up to make at home. I am really glad I picked up some extra coconut milk and green curry paste, you will find out why in a second. I go home and see that Leland is home. he was suppose to be at a meeting until late last evening so when I saw his car I was totally excited. I asked him to help with the groceries and when he was closing the trunk the bag on his arm got caught, had a hole ripped in it and the curry sauce fell on the ground and broke. The parking lot had some good curry that night. I was half tempted to scoop it off the ground and try to salvage it, but I controlled myself. Luckily I had bought the coconut milk and paste so no worries. That was just the beginning of an awful evening.

As we are putting away the groceries I was telling Leland about my fantastic trip to the store and he says he's glad I had a good trip to the store and didn't know if he should tell me what he was about to tell me. I told him to tell me what was up. He says that he got a message from his mom that his parents are getting a divorce. I so thought he was kidding because he had a little grin on his face. He then tells me it's serious and proceeds to tell me that a couple of weeks ago when we went to his dad's team's football game that his dad had told him that he was thinking about a divorce but not to say anything to his mom or me. Now I am feeling really bad because I didn't even notice that Leland was not himself that night and hasn't really been himself since then. How could I not notice? Was I so into myself and the other things going on in my life that I couldn't notice my husband was a little different? He is not that good at hiding things so I should have noticed something, right? This is going to be a tough trial for all in the family. Last night there was a different atmosphere in the home. Things just weren't right. I know this is really hard on Leland, but he won't say anything to me about it. I want to be able to help him, but it may take a long time before he is ready for it. While I wait, I worry. I can't help it, I'm a worrier (sp?).

The yearbook for this year is all about wishes. Right now I wish all was right and good within the family. I wish people had to work things out and figure out how to be happy again. I never thought something like this would effect me so much. Maybe it's because it effects someone I love so much. I don't know how long it will take to get over this, but I am hoping it will not take long. I know this is something that will be in the back of my mind for a very long time.

On a brighter note, Christmas break starts today! Finally, rest for my weariness. I can also get into the gym and workout again. Oh Gold's how I have missed you. I can't wait to get back to you and start working off this 15 or 20 lbs I have gained this school year so far.

Fun

UTEP is in the #35 (out of 35) ranked bowl game of the year playing against BYU. I will be living in a house divided on December 18 when the two teams meet on the field. My side, navy and orange. Leland's side (or should I say corner ;), blue and white. I may not be a fan of the school I received my bachelor's degree from, but I have never been one to really care about the school I went to. I went to school for two reasons, education and athletics. It really didn't matter where I went as long as it was affordable and I received the knowledge I needed. I am not real big on all that school spirit jazz. I have to give love to my Miners, but I reeally don't think they are going to win this one. They may come out guns blazing in the first half or so, but after that they fizzle. It happens every year. To all my UTEP peeps, don't hate because you know it's true, it happens all the time. I will support my Miners because anyone is better than the Cougars. Oh, and good luck to Pay Dirt Pete in the Capitol One Mascot Bowl. He's up against the Old Dominion Blue or something weird like that. If you get a chance look up the Capitol One Mascot Bowl website and give Pete a holla and a vote. GO PETE GO!

On another note, I have been sick again this week. I feel like I am always sick now. I just don't get it. Maybe it's time to buckle down and get a real doc. This time I am a little concerned because this illness, whatever it was caused me to throw-up and I have not thrown-up due to illness since I was in the 3rd grade. Yes, that's right twenty years ago was the last time I threw-up due to illness. The last time I actually threw up was 7th grade and only because I was dehydrated and no one told me I wasn't suppose to chug water or gatorade when dehydrated, so it all came back up. I do not like the whole throwing up thing. Now I am worried that since it happened once it will happen in the future. All this happened on Tuesday night and I am still having some troubles with my tummy after I eat . Regular food, does not like me. Water does not like me. Ginger ale and cranberry limeade seem to be doing the trick, but nothing else. I hope it all clears up by this afternoon because Leland and I are going to the Tamale Fest at Pearl today and I want me some delicioso tamales! Here's to hoping all clears up and things go well. It looks like it's time to go. More writing to come as the year winds down and school gets out for the first semester. Peace!

Christmas Devotional

Last night was the First Presidency Christmas message. I love the messages every year. The main message, to me anyway, was to remember what the season is all about. President Uchtdorf reminded us not to be like the Grinch. President Eyring reminded us of Christ's mission. President Monson recalled a story from WWII in which there was a three-story house that a few American were living in. During the day an elderly German lady would come and clean the house and leave it sparkling. The America would go to the PX and get his allotment of candy bars, soap and a couple other things. He would use what he needed then store the rest in his footlocker. He decided that he was going to give this poverty-stricken women what was in his footlocker as a Christmas gift. He was feeling so proud of himself, thinking that she would be so grateful for the gift because she would be able to use it as currency in her village and be seen as a rich woman. He was very smug about the whole thing. He arrived home that night to find the gift and the woman gone, but on the table was 10 postcards pre-WWII with full buildings. The woman had put the postcards together to form a star, the Christmas Star. The woman's gift was not one of elegance or "Look at what good I have done". Her gift was one given of humility and love. Which ahs reminded me that the gift of love is better than a gift given that is elegant or over the top. There many gifts that we can give that are not of a monetary matter. We have many talents that we are able to share. May I encourage all those who actually read this blog to use the gifts and talents that you have been given to bless another person's life. The person you help will be more blessed than if you just give them the book they have been wanting because you may be giving them something they need but didn't realize it until you stepped in. Good luck this Christmas season. Merry Christmas!

Tis the Season!

I am so excited it's the Christmas season! I love this time of year. This year I have actually decorated a little bit. I have placed a few of my favorite Nativity scenes on my cocktail table and on the shelf between the kitchen and the living room. The other Nativities are more for a Christmas tree that will be coming out very shortly. I just have to find out where to place it. Things were so much easier before I started living with a boy. I actually had room for all my decorations and I knew ahead of time where everything was going to go. I still don't know where the tree is going to go because there is so much stuff in there. I really need a house or some place with two bedrooms so there can be an office for Leland's bookshelves and desk. When Dad was visiting he talked to me about getting a bigger place. I agree, we need something bigger, but we are tied in to our lease until July and we really don't know where we are going to be next year after Leland graduates so houses are a little out of the question right now. I digress.
Christmas! Last year there was so much focus on the wedding that Christmas just kinda got pushed aside. This year, I am starting Christmas off right. I love music.yahoo.com because I can have Christmas music all day at work. Teachers and some students have walked into my office and heard the music and their spirits are a little lifted. I love the music of the season, it makes me happy. I still have not done any shopping because I have no idea what to get anyone this year. Finances are tight this year, so there may be some homemade gifts or just cards in the future. Seeing that I am not crafty nor do I have the ability to make things look nice the homemade gift may not work, so cards it is!
The thing I love the most about this season is the focus on Christ. Many people would rather focus on the shopping and the crowds and everything else, but that's the 100th thing on the list when it comes to CHRISTmas. As the season begins and all things Christmas are underway, think about those around you and how you can serve them. Think about our loving Heavenly Father who gave his Only Begotten Son. Think about the birth of the Savior. Remember what he did for you so that you could someday live with your Heavenly Father again. This season I am going to strive to do all those things. Gifts are not important, but family, time with friends and other loved ones, and Jesus Christ are. Merry Christmas (not Happy Holidays)?