My Soapbox and Then Some

Last night I went to the Fiesta Flambeau Parade to end the week of Fiesta. It was okay, but I expected more. Anyway, at the beginning of the parade there were numerous Armed Forces groups that walked through the streets holding the American flag. This is what really eats me up: people had no respect for the veterans and soldiers nor the American Flag. As these brave men and women walked through the streets there was very little clapping for them. I saw only a couple of people stand when the flag was paraded in front of us. Our children see this and take note. If parents do not teach their kids what to do when the flag is around and to show respect for those who have so courageously fought for our country then who will? More people clapped for the high school bands than for the Armed Forces groups that came by. It is a sad day in this country when there is no respect for the men and women who serve for it, to protect us when we are threatened, and to watch over us so we can sleep in our beds without fear of being blown-up, and protect our freedoms. If it hadn't been for those in the military we would not be the country we are today. I have so much respect for those men and women and what they do for my America. People see it as a disgrace these days of someone wants to join the military. Those people are ridiculed and laughed at. I would love for those who do that to go live in a country where they are not guaranteed protection or freedom. How would they like it? Would they be able to handle it? Would they survive? Would they have a greater respect for the things they can do and enjoy here in the good ole US of A? Show some respect to the country that has given you so much! Show some respect for those who protect you so you can sleep at night! Show some patriotism for the country that has not turned it's back on you! The government may have some issues, but the Declaration of Independence, The Constitution and the principals within those documents have never turned their backs on you! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!

Okay I'm off my soapbox. Now for the rest of my life. I hate having things up in the air and not knowing what is going on. I have to have some type of direction for the future. Where will I be next school year? I don't know and it's killing me! It's almost May and I haven't had my contract talk for next year. It always makes me wonder if I will even have a job next year. Every other school district has given it's contracts to it's employees for next year, but I don't have mine yet. I know my school will be mad if they start getting recommendation requests from school districts around the state and I haven't told them anything, but what do they expect? I don't know if I have a job next year from them so I have to start looking and putting in applications everywhere. If they expect people to not do that they need to get the contracts out right now. I know they are waiting for the TAKS results to come back to see what core teachers they want to have back the following year, but I am PE and Health, gosh darn it! I don't have any TAKS tests for my students! Why can't I know if I am coming back next year or not? I hate feeling so lost. I just want things to work out how I want them to work out. I know, we make plans and God laughs a little, but I need a plan for my future, especially in this economy. Is my faith waning? I think it is a little. Am I doubting? No, but not trusting. That sounds so bad right now. Ugh! Can't I catch a career break right now?

Number 2: This is going to sound really bad, but I didn't want to be at church today. I was excited for Sacrament meeting, but the rest I really didn't care for. It's almost as if everything these past two months has been about the same thing. I feel like we have been talking about the same old stuff every week. It seems as though everything has been about trials and passing the "test" before you. Isn't there something else to talk about? Aren't there more things out there to talk about besides trials or are we just going through so many of them that we can't think about or talk about anything else? I am just bored with it all right now? I feel as though I have no passion. Prayer, scripture study and all that jazz still happens, but I can't get excited. Have you ever felt that way? Maybe I am just too stressed about everything else. I don't know. It's bad of me and I am confessing my sin to the world, but isn't confession the first step to repentance? Maybe I just need some change in my life. Maybe I am just bored with everything that is going on in the rest of my life and it is being manifest through my spiritual life.

Things just aren't in good order right now and I need to figure out why. I just wish I knew where to start. Any ideas?