Aaaaaaaaaack!

Remember the "Cathy" comic strip? She used to always say "Aaaaaack" when she felt way in over her head. Sometimes I feel like that. I feel as though everything is in a downward spiral. Mostly because I don't have any control over a situation. If I don't have control over something that has to deal with me and my future then I feel stressed. I have to have a lot of faith that everything will be okay and turn out how it is suppose to turn out. It's just stressful knowing my fate, my future, is in the hands of another person. It's just so hard for me to relinquish that control. I just had an "aha!" moment. I never thought of myself as controlling, but I am. Wow! The more control I am able to take the more confident and comfortable I am. I am one of those control freaks now. It goes to show I have very little faith. I was talking to someone last night and we talked about having more faith. I thought I had enough faith, but now I realize, I have none. It's time to repent and learn to give up a little control and have faith. It's going to be hard, but it's gotta be done. I also just now received a bunch of stuff from work that I really should have had months ago and found out I have to get everything done and uploaded to the state by the end of May. 450 tests to adminster and inout into the computer, by myself, by the end of May. Okay, why is everything done at the last minute? One of my co-workers just recieved something yesterday that came in back in March. That just adds to my control issues and stress. I have no control over the situation. I was actually hoping my place of employment would not have to do this testing, but I was wrong. It really hoovers.
Today is Earth Day and my mom's birthday. Mom would always tell me the entire country celebrates her birthday and really, they do. Plant a tree, use less paper, turn off the lights, take mass transit, turn off the water while brushing your teeth all are great ways to appreciate the earth. Have a day and appreciate the earth around you. I know there is alot of stuff going on with earthquakes in the middle of Illinois (of all places) and Texas, drought, flooding, tornadoes, and other natural disasters, but there is so much to appreciate. The trees that are still standing, grass, flowers, sky, water, you know the good stuff in life. I am grateful for everything I have been blessed with. There are so many things that I cannot name them all. Heavenly Father has given me so much and I am grateful to Him for all he has given.